Monday, June 14, 2021

Today’s thought of the day…

Let yourself get excited!

Let yourself get excited. Sounds kinda stupid huh? To me, it is actually a big deal. I tend to do this thing where I like to avoid pain, I like to run away. If I know that there is potential pain down the road then I don’t let myself feel fully in the present so that I can avoid the pain that will come.

For at least the past few years I have avoided letting myself feel excited about things. For example, I had some very good friends come to visit me in Raleigh about a month and a half ago. I had been living alone for the first time and hadn’t seen them in months but I didn’t let myself get excited about their visit because I knew they would leave after a few days and I would feel sad and alone when they left. To avoid feeling that sadness when they left, I didn’t let myself get too excited about their visit. Plot twist: I was still really sad when they left.

I have another group of really good friends coming to visit this weekend and I am letting myself get excited! I am letting myself feel the emotions that are coming up from an event in my life which is huge progress for me. I’m not shutting down, I am letting myself be excited and when they leave I am ready for the sadness that will come.

This may not be big progress for anyone else, but it damn sure is for me and I am EXCITED about it!

-Rohit